Growth From Sickness

The boys got sick about 6 days ago and are still trying to get over it. I know most all parents have been through this in one form or another- having two get it at once at this age was somewhat scary and at times I didn't know what to do because sick children naturally want their mom. Having two wanting to be held, rocked, nurtured and soothed is something that I had to learn to do this week. However, I have to say: I saw the most remarkable things happen with my boys, my husband, family and friends. The things I learned this week will always be with me, making me that much better of a parent in the future.

• When you have a very sick child, NOTHING else in this world matters- NOTHING!
• When they get that first little " perk up" and smile again- you can honestly say you have never been happier in life.
• I learned with fevers that high- one of the things people say is to put them in a cool bath. This is actually not true because when fevers run around103-104 it can put them in a seizure. Best thing to do is wipe each arm, leg, neck, head, belly, back with a cool cloth and let it air dry to draw out the fever and reduce body temp.
• Having a great husband who will help stay up with you to try to figure out what will help your baby, as I tried to sooth was so so helpful and the kindest thing you can ask for in a marriage.
• Who cares if you have to call your doctor 10 times a day to ask questions, I got over feeling weird about that, seriously done with that. I realized these were my one in only children and I need all the help I can get through the doctors educating me on how to treat two little babies at once. They were wonderful about it.
• Keeping them calm (and yourself)- I learned when I had to hold Nicolas one night almost 24 hours straight, to calm him I sang soft lullabies I used to when he was a baby, prayed all through the night, and realized that GOD GAVE ME the strength, patience and courage to hold 22 pounds in my arms most of the night.
  
• Just having so many friends and family calling to check in and offer support and advice was what I needed to give me the confidence to help them.
• Take it minute by minute - because the next minute could be an entirely different issue.
  
• Get as much help as you can- when you can- at all cost!! Having Lou here most of the week gave me support and guidance. There were so many little things to help comfort the kids that I did not know and through her experiences, I just listened and tried them. Most worked and that was a true blessing.
  
• Being up all night-for almost a week straight--it doesn't matter!! Yes, your a complete zombie but I think God gives you the strength to get through it and your adrenaline naturally goes.
• Resorting back to the bottle and letting them sleep with you is fine for comforting and soothing them- who cares what the books say. Sick kids need soothing!
• Who cares about prior appointments and such ( unless emergency of course), be home with your kids- take care of them, they need you more now then ever.
  
• Last but not least...the best learning on how to be a good productive nurturing parent to sick kids DOES NOT COME FROM A BOOK OR INTERNET!!! It comes from life experience and educating yourself from others who has been there.
  

Now things I learned that I need to come up with a solution now that they are better:

• How do I stop giving them EVERYTHING THEY want ( which I did this week) especially now that I see those sweet smiles again!
• Going back down from 4 bottles a day to none!!!!
• How do I catch up on everything else?
• How do I "tame my germ phobia" which has kicked into super high gear!!!!! Grocery store carts, touching things, other kids, playground, swings....YUCK! YUCK! YUCK!!! Well, regardless I will overcome that, especially since all my best friends have children and we all know kids get sick!!! :)
  

So to all the parents out there- especially with twins- you can get through it- it is hard as heck- but with support in the house- you can do it!!!! The boys love each other so much and this really showed as they got better and were so happy to see each other to play. They slept in separate rooms while sick but even when they were at their sickest, I sensed they were still lost without each other.