Forget It! Twin Insanity

Yeah...forget about my post from 2 days ago when I said I could reason more with the kids- This morning was CRAZY TOWN in this house. When Twin 3 year old's are in a bad mood and mommy isn't feeling good, not a good match. I think I was taught a lesson here..be humble, don't point out to the world all the fabulous in your life in case other's are struggling, don't say your kids take 3 hour naps (like I did) when their kids may not and it is torture for them. Sure say the cute things, the funny things but every freaking time I put something in my blog that is super good going on...the next day it is the opposite. Don't get me wrong, I believe in positive thoughts, Shit I have a graduate degree in the psych field and studied cognative/behavior therapy and know it works, but I think when you brag to much, you are not being humble. God gives us things to learn by, to teach us. Mine...be more humble. Let me just recap the twin insanity of today, haven't had one in a while (wait..is that a brag?) and I won't ever tell anyone again my kids take 3 hour naps!


1.) 6:35 am - Ken's first words to me "The coffee maker exploded and it's everywhere". Me..."What!" "Crap, do you mean everywhere" Grinds/water everywhere. Please understand coffee is my crutch, my vice if you will. If I don't have it before my eyes are even awake it just doesn't seem normal and I have a shady haze of fog in my head. On top of it, my stupid cough still not gone.
2.) 7:15 -Kids woke up clingy and a tad bit grumpy. I say a "tad" bit because that was nothing compared to what happened the rest of am.


3.) 7:16 - I put on my happy morning "cheery" face and I reached out for a big hug from Christian. He SCREAMS "No, I want Daddy" and pushes past me. Did I seriously get pushed by a 3 year old at 7 in the morning? He flys out, wants daddy. Meanwhile, Nicolas starts yelling..MOMMY I want downstairs, where is my sheep? (Ken and I can not find the sheep and have been looking for about a week now). Oh Lord.....thank god Ken is here. The damn lost sheep.

4.) Back up- kids didn't fall asleep until after nine last night....probably the stupid 3 hour naps that I bragged about.


5.) 7:45 -Kids decided..wait demanded they just HAD to have two bowls of cereal each because one wanted Oatmeal other wanted Apple Jacks ...then they wanted both. A normal mother would say no. But not me, I am exhausted, sick and don't want to pick that battle today. So instead, I am in the mad scramble of making 4 bowls of cereal at once, getting drinks while Nicolas still whining...."Mommy, I want my sheep.... Christian crying "Mommy, I can't do this.."(his tinker toy set- he gets so mad when it doesn't work out what he imagines it to look like). Thankfully, Nicolas says something cute to Christian, "Here you go buddy, I will help you". Lightens up my mood.


6.) Ken still can't find the sheep.


7.) 8:00 am -Didn't want their cereal, only took like 4 bites and knocked milk off table. GRRRRR....waste of food and money!


8.) When finished, cling-on's begin and toys not working right. House very loud with "Mommy -up, Mommy up" "Mommy fix this please, mommy PLEASE" simultaneously. Again, another lesson - NEVER BRAG. Case in point: last night I was talking to Ken how I can easily swoop both of them up in my arms if I needed to, almost 60 lbs...Had to even brag by demonstrating so he could Master it. God has a sense of humor to teach us all never to brag because this morning, I couldn't simultaneously pick them up for more than a minute or two, my wrists were killing me and I was hacking up a lung. A double GRRRRR...


9.) I left the house without brushing/doing my hair- I forgot!! I have a Doctor's Appt and have to bring kids. Not a huge deal but the mad dash is on to pack up snacks, lunches, get them both dressed, all 3 of us to us bathroom, give them some sort of snack since they didn't eat their cereal, my stuff, table cleaned up (well dishes thrown in sink), get the dog to eat so he doesn't get in garbage, get dog go outside to go to the bathroom (he refuses when he knows we are leaving) and get them lock and loaded in the car. Using bribery, chasing them around the house as Nicolas is screaming "I don't want to go, I don't want to go anywhere, laying down lifeless on the floor so I can't pick him up. Christian screaming " I don't feel good". So, I skip their hair brush/teeth brush. Oh well. Worse things could happen.


10.) 9:40- because I am 20 minutes late to my appt, I try and call Dr to let them know but I had to hang up because the receptionist couldn't hear over Nicolas screaming "I want my book, I want my book". Christian, " I want my special treat"!


11.) Just as I get on the highway both books fall on the ground and all hell breaks out. "MOMMY MY BOOK, MY BOOK, GET IT"!! I explain I am driving and I can't. Nicolas starts yelling, "Stop then mom, Stop, pull over". Seriously, I don't know where my kids are, who's kids are these?


12.) 10:00- Girlfriend calls and when she hears them she says "Wow, one of those days and while driving huh"! Yep is all I can muster out. She said "Did you bring the back up- the Ipods for the Dr appt to keep them occupied"? Yes!! Jackpot. THEN HOLY CRAP, I forgotthe one at home that is charging, after I told them they could have. Okay,this is bad. Not bad in the realty of big things in true life but the realty of this moment of having to go to the Dr.'s with 2 cranky kids and nothing to entertain them. Then made the mistake of saying to my friend "WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITHOUT THE IPODS TO KEEP THEM CALM AT DOCTORS?". Well, Nicolas heard that and immediately started slamming me with " Where's my Ipod Mommy, Why did you forget it, I want it, do you have Christians, TURN AROUND, MAKE A U-TURN"! What 3 year old says Make a Uturn?



13.)Got the appt done - decided to treat us to Chick fila since they were "okay" at Dr's. Couldn't remember where it was. LITERALLY! Seriously? What has just happened? I went down three main streets in our area, make about 100 u-turns and finally 25 minutes later found it. Christian says "I DON"T WANT IT". Super GRRRR. I am so tired, sick and just want to sleep today off. I want to hide out and drink a jug of wine (wait...I don't even drink) maybe hide and drink a quart of coffee (wait..we are out of coffee and sugar). Damn it.

14.) Put them to bed early. As I have been posting this, trying to block their noise out, they have been awake laughing and I have been upstairs 5 times to try and settle their little Party.

1st Time- I heard the sweet pitter- patter of their feet, I smile it was a 2 second sweet sound, but then I heard the thumping and I knew they were up to no good. They turned off there monitor!!! I can't believe they know about the monitor and what it does.

2nd Time -I found them in the closet, with all the clothes off the lower shelf, hangers, hiding with the doors shut laughing, thinking I can't see them. Mommy is not laughing because they did this last week. Actually, mommy laughing before they see me.

Final warning - beds are going to be turned back around if they don't stay in. They have that hysterical over tired crazy laugh kids get when there is no reasoning, it was in full force. They tag teamed me and darted out of the room in 2 different directions. OMG- I am tired.

4th Time - BAD TIME! I went back up ready for the battle, I found them with all blankets, pillows, animals, clothes and underwear off! No big deal, it happens but as I walked in the room, Christian looks at me in the eye and says "I'm going potty" and purposely actually went, yes, went on his bed. All I can say is Holy Shit (to myself). He has not done this since what...18 months old? I am so mad, well I actually laughed as he did it (turned my head) in pure shock. Utter shock and for a second said to myself, Oh well, it's funny, one of those memories I will always have to make me laugh, Then I got mad because they were not listening to me and I have to discipline again, all this work to do to clean up, as I am hacking up a lung from my coughing. I turned the beds around like cages. Put them both on Potty. As I am going to clean up the mess, Christian went #2 on Potty but jumped off the toilet and ran, ran, ran before I could wipe him. Then he went into that crazy, hysterical laughter and I fought him to get him dressed as he kept pulling his clothes back off. Nicolas joined in. It has been 1.5 hours now of this. Crib chair rail of the bed is broken. Photo of the beds turned around against wall, I call it the cage.

• 5th and final....now what?

It's crazy town in this house today and I believe I have been taught a good lesson. Be humble, don't brag how great things are. So please if all else...ignore my last long blog! They are not listening today, there was no reasoning at this exact moment and I was not a happy mommy this morning! Yes, I love staying home, truly wouldn't want it any other way, yes I am blessed, yes I love my kids more than anything in life, yes I try to capture each sweet moment but today....I am in crazy town. It is hard work especially when I have 3 resumes to do, HR work before I leave on my trip but I can't put 1 business thought together and I keep hacking up a lung. So, for my outlet, I sit here and blog instead and drink a can of hawiann punch because I need that sugar high, while there is a pile a dishes in sink, a huge pile of clean clothes in laundry room to fold, room full of toys and I am hacking up a lung.

But wait...they are quiet now....I think they fell asleep.. should I brag and say they will probably sleep for 3 hours and I can get everything done? Nope, noway, just going to hope! Just hope for a good quiet happy afternoon.